Just Jot It January is Linda G. Hill’s gem. The prompt “Master” is brought to us by Sadje of Keep It Alive.
When I saw the prompt I went musical. “It’s a lot/It’s a lot…” With Depeche Mode. Then I found myself in Les Miz with om pah pah om pah Enter Monsieur
Since it is January and everyone is talking about resolutions or possibilities of healthy living I thought how many things I want to master. Like I’d like to move without pain. Eat, drink, and move with a mastery of self and pain. I think it is possible. I’ll keep trying.
The other day I found that Udemy is having a sale on classes for editing. It was such a good bargain (and I hope they are good people). So, I’d like to master my writing.
Okay, maybe mastery is too perfect. I want proficiency to the point that I like what I’m doing and unafraid to share with others. What I have learned over my life is that perfection is lonely and never fun. It can send me running away if I find myself working in that mindset. On the other hand, not trying will never get you there. Finding a balance of trying and being happy in the attempt seems the only way I can do anything.
Does that make sense? I was raised by someone that wanted perfection. Wouldn’t let me leave the piano until I could play a phrase or song perfectly. The bed needed to be made perfectly, the house should be cleaned perfectly. But that parent was bipolar. The house would be so clean you could eat off the bathroom floor, or she’d be laying on the sofa in complete depression. So as an adult, I had a hard time finding my own levels.
I needed to find how to be happy playing the piano. Singing helped. I needed to find how to clean and thought I had it down to happy until the fibro hit. Then I found I had to be happy with whatever my body allowed that moment. Delegate and be happy with how they do it–or don’t.
It seems that nowadays I have to look at every movement for every job and goal. Oh, and maybe the word happy isn’t it. I think I could happy my way back to weeks in bed. When I really get into something, say working on a pair of socks, I can enjoy it too much. Hands hurting for weeks but nice to have the socks done? The trade-off is too off. So the aim is to do just short of the goal. Be happy with the results later. Not the way we have been taught. But maybe more the master of life by knowing limitations?
You would think at 69 I’d have this whole concept mastered. Live and learn. Have you found mastery of life easy?
Most days I’m pretty good, others, like today, my brain is all over the place with no clear goal in sight. I know what I SHOULD be doing, yet I don’t want to do that, or I have a million ideas of other things to do. I might be cooking something one minute, then think “I need to be doing something for someone else” the next. I do housework all over the place too. I feel guilty if I sit down to watch tv during the day, so I usually turn it off. I want to make time for crafts, but feel I should be writing, cleaning, visiting my Dad more…whatever.
Udemy has great classes and if you want to be a freelance editor and make that a side hustle, that would be the way to go. They have lots of writing classes too, some classes are free I think. If not, you can also find free classes on Skillshare, once you make an account! Happy studying!
I want to give this wonderful comment a good reply but I’m on my phone and my eyes and fingers can’t do it justice. Does anyone have a hint as to how to save comments to be sure to reply?
Isn’t contentment better than happy, anyway? It certainly lasts longer. I have a theory that we’re all looking for balance, but we’re too much for ourselves. Old critics, new fans…
The very best thing I’ve ever done is stop looking back for comparisons — OF MYSELF. What a torture.
I hope you let us see more of your vulnerability in your writing. I think readers and writers desperately want to connect.
Thank you for what you are saying here. I must admit that I find going deep into emotion so very hard. I have gone to therapist and in the end I am talking about how they are doing, how’s the kids. So vulnerability is hard for me to see and share. Thanks for pointing it out and I will try to look at this as an example. You are right, I love looking at other blogs for how people deal with their inner worlds and how it relates to the outer world.
Your ‘wall’ — I get it. At your own pace. Even if you don’t share it, I hope you’ll write it. It’s good for the soul ❤
I will try, Joey. Thanks for the continuing encouragement! ❤