Darswords

Rootless by Krystle Zara Appiah
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This was a difficult read. I didn’t initially relate to any of the characters, except for not fitting in. I think everyone has had the occasion where they find themselves in a group they don’t feel is for them. Efe finds herself there most of her life.

At one point, I did find myself paying closer attention. I think it was when the couple found themselves expecting a baby. Yes, I was raised during the 50s and 60s. Women were to be barefoot, pregnant, and happy about it. Well, throwing up and being tired all the time didn’t fit with how I was supposed to feel. Cultural expectations and my own clashed as women’s lib was showing that we had choices. Too late for me. I was already entirely indoctrinated.

Still, after the babies were born, I found they taught me all I needed. They knew how to do the baby parts, and I learned the mama parts. I know for a fact that I was fortunate. Being a mom isn’t built into our genes. No more than being a dad comes with the part he played in the baby-making. And they have had their share of expectations. Now smush those ideas and realities into play, and every marriage and parenting situation brings challenges no one expected.

Efe and Sam come into parenting the same way, full of expectations and realities that don’t fit the stories they were supposed to believe. I can see how poor Efe and other pregnant women can feel the way they do. There can be no normal with mental and emotional issues in the mix. Each person has to learn their way. Here is an excellent story to show how understanding your partner, even when you don’t show what love is. Efe does her best out of love. Sam does his best out of love. Yet, the story doesn’t go according to expectations. I feel like I want to give everyone a hug and move on. No amount of talking can help the emotional issues at hand.

By the way, as indifferent as I felt at the beginning of the book, I suggest having the Kleenex handy. I was in shock and had difficulty sleeping after the story ended.

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