The groove still sits empty. No bike, no walk, once with recorders–maybe when I finish writing this. A couple nights with the new Enya Ukulele. No piano. Haven’t straightened or sealed Dock Diamond Painting.
New slipper socks are moving along.
I haven’t touched these. Until this moment.
Same story here. Darn if touching these and writing this isn’t making a spark of desire click in.
So maybe this blog of self-awareness is keeping me honest to myself.
ADHD plays a part here. Flitting from idea to idea gets nothing done. Before I left the obsessive side was helping to get things done. And the arthritis side kept me from getting to the point of being crippled from any one hobby.
The only obsession this week has been finishing my old Sudoku book and reaching
On the other hand, it’s been nice to hang out with my husband this week.
Okay now time for Enya.
I know. Not a Uke but Bitmoji doesn’t have one for me.
I just learned that I might get to travel to Washington for a friend’s birthday. Oops! No money what to do for a present? Heck, I have yarn! Slipper socks! But, hopefully, these will be big enough. The sizer/blocker doesn’t go far enough for the recipient’s great understanding. Winging it!
My watermelon socks are coming along.Another pair of no-show sneaker socks are nearing the heel.
Here are all the pieces I’m playing with. Embarrassingly, that Music of Today book, I think I learned in 5th or 6th grade. So many good! But my husband says he heard a lot of improvement. Just when I thought no one was listening. 😥. By the way, at the far left is Succession. I didn’t like the show so much. I watched it for the music. But I’ll have to work up to it.
I’m having a lot of fun with this book.
This is one of the easiest songs. Can’t wait to learn guitar! But first I’m conquering the uke. I’m planning on giving my $11 Memorex to my son when I upgrade to an Enya. By the way, the Memorex regardless of price, holds tune very well and despite my ineptitude still sounds nice.
In this book with my recorders, I’m teaching myself to do harmonies so I can record me playing with myself. Keep it clean! You know what I mean!
For example, see how at the bottom of the page is the alto playing melody. Above is both soprano playing melody and alto playing harmony. I’ve worked through most of the book and can finally do both recorders’ melodies. Now learning the harmony.
Just because I think they’re pretty.
The dock is coming along. Though I’m working on it upside down to make it easier on my arms and back, it’s fun to see the picture right side up.
Ah, but here’s the problem. These “hard” ones in this EASY Sudoku book aren’t fun. I need lots of penciled hints. Even then I have to cheat and look up a few. Do I keep it up and finish regardless of difficulty or move on to another book where it starts very easy. Oh, the dilemma!
My other socks took a sideline as I finished the slippers. So I’ll take pics next week.
The dock is nearly finished. It reminds me of my son-in-love and daughter’s wedding dock At his parents’ home, at a lake. It is so beautiful there.
I feel better about my piano. We have love/hate moments. I do learn a lot with each sit down. I play not practice. I do work on problem areas. I work on my concentration. I see my playing as meditation. Here’s a thought. Check. Don’t dive in. A slight thought given attention can bring about a mistake tornado. Distraction of any kind can throw off the fun.
Take for instance, today I wanted to analyze the few pieces I shared last week. By thinking about key signatures my fingers lost their groove.
I’m much happier about the ukulele now. Being able to sing while playing makes this instrument far more fun than piano or recorders.
See those post-its? I can sing and play 16 songs in this book. No, not for an audience, but for fun. Still, I stumble, but it is fun. Isn’t that what counts?
This is that songbook.
Recorders seem to be helping my breath control. Note recognition between the soprano and the alto instruments is getting better. I still have goals of playing duets with myself. I need to learn how to record like that.
That’s about it for now. Time to get to Duo, and the recorders and uke.
Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “move.” Use it as a verb or a noun; write the first thing that comes to mind. Have fun!
Moving was the title I gave to the memoir I wrote a couple of NaNoWriMos ago. The name started revealing itself to me right away. At first, it was that even though I was in two houses for my first twenty-one years, they kept building schools for our grade level, and we were the newbies to settle each new school. After marriage, my husband’s job moved us around the state.
My story then ran in how my mental attitude moved from one thinking to another. Music played a part in the many mental states I phased through. And since I have been reentering the music world for a while, movement is a prominent word in that realm.
Each piece was a movement from one symphony or another. As a music major whose professor was the conductor of the college orchestra, I sat in on a lot of concerts. But I couldn’t sit still. My teacher saw that I needed to be a part of the music, so she made sure I had the orchestral score to follow along with. My aim in music in college was voice, not piano. There was too much psychology attached to that big, beautiful machine.
In the next few days, I plan to break it all down. Needless to say, I need to move from the depth of stagefright that even played a part in yesterday’s practices to phone calls or being with more than people I know very, very well.
Now I need to move, to Duo, then uke, then recorder, then bed. Get up and MOVE!
Remember way back when I mentioned I might start a podcast? I can’t remember what I thought I’d call it, but a new title comes to mind as I started day # 3 of piano reawakening. “Warts and All”
We are so used to seeing the end result of endless practice. That makes sitting in front or with your art impossible. “I’ll never be that good. Why try?” So many negative things we tell ourselves, and because of that, we will never know what enjoyment we might bring ourselves or others while waiting for perfection. Follow your passions. God, muses, whatever you may call it, gets the credit for your curiosity drive. Do we dare let our defeatism lead the way? So I’m taking you on the ride. I took piano lessons since I was 5. I rebelled my way out around 16. After marriage at 21, I had to wait a while to get my old piano. My second son was teething when I got my piano back. I was rusty but could still enjoy the below pieces and much more, nearly totally memorized. I would play so hyperfocused that that piano had teething marks as the poor baby begged for my attention. So, I had to keep the practice to light bits.
When we moved to my first desert, Antelope Valley, the house was so small I had to keep the piano in a chicken coop. It was an old upright grand. It looked quite at home there. I would get up and go out in my heavy coat and gloves, scarf, and cap. As I did the scales and warm-ups, layers were released. I was starting to fall in love with my kidnapper. Stockholm Syndrome? There was a lot of angst from the psychological damage that practicing piano imposed on me.
A few decades later, after letting myself enjoy other music, singing, playing the recorder, and playing the ukulele, I felt like I wanted to try to bring it all back. Three days ago, I figured out a time of the day I could schedule my piano time. My first day was a lot of cleaning my baby. We get a lot of dust out here. And the darned mice. Lots of cleaning. But hey, that old piano in the chicken coop was pretty bad, too. And I love this piano. How I got it is another story. So cleaning it was, is now, a work of love. I did start playing that day for a few minutes. It went well. I kept it to 15 minutes. For some reason, yesterday’s practice made me want to cry. Today I decided to start recording myself and sharing the mess and progress with you. You are not required to listen to these as if they were elevator music. It is merely how it is when you try.
Solfeggietto by Carl Philipp Emanuel BachSarabande and Variations from Suite no. 4 in D minor George Frideric Handel (1685-1759)Prelude No. 1 from Well-tempered Clavichord by J. S. BachSix Variations by L. van Beethoven
I did play this a bit, but I want to start fresh on it. I love this piece.
Enough of music. I’ll share the uke and recorder progress later.
I’m nearly halfway through the Dock diamond painting. The light behind shows the need to use a straightener. Wow!
I got a few more rows. I love the watermelon socks! MINE!
I thought I was on the decreasing part of the heel when I realized that these won’t fit my son; they are almost too small for me. Mismeasuring happens to me sometimes. I can measure my own feet, but other feet are in other cities! So, it’s time to frog back to the beginning of the heel. Still, I love this yarn so much that I ordered more. I love my own slippers from this peacock yarn.
My husband and I have been having a lot of discussions about music, practice time and spaces. At the end of our discussion we agreed on the above bit of mutual quote as our different drum we’re beating.
Our discussion from last night and this morning found my piano time. And I had fun. I can’t wait to play again, tomorrow.
Here’s that holey bendy bits and the rings bits. How do they fits?
Bendies at the top and bottom of the three chains. Ringies hook the top of the chains to the heart and another hooks the big gem at the bottom. Squeeze the hole parts onto the chain with pliers. Make sure they are on tight or you will be flustered and floundering and possibly throwing all the bits. Two suncatchers more to go. Enough frustration for this day!
Progress, mostly halfway finished
Real flounders entice sea turtles down to floor. The flounders are having a feast!
Another pair of slipper socks. I’m incorporating that nice stretchy arch I learned with the no-show socks.
I’m getting a little better with chording on the ukulele. I almost don’t have to look when changing from C to F to G7 and back to C all the while singing. Almost time for a new lesson. It’s supposed to be a 30 day course, but my soft, achy fingers needed more time. I’m still learning day 9 a couple weeks later.
The recorder comes and goes. Teaching myself and my fingers soprano, alto, and tenor. I can finally reach all notes on soprano and alto, though not consistently. I can barely get the top three holes of the tenor.
And. AND I CLEANED THE PIANO WELL SO IT WELCOMES ME! Maybe tomorrow I’ll actually play!!!!
A quick note. Door push-ups, floor to ceiling stretches, then more than 30 minutes or more than 5 miles on the stationary bike. All still happening. So some things are growing into habits. Others are still work. But a lot of flounder still happens. Ah, well, it’s February!
After National Novel Writing Month in November, then the birthdays, Christmas and cold, and the occasional editing and keeping up the journal, somehow, January needed help. Linda G. Hill gives us Just Jot It January. The prompts help make sure we write something every day. I have done those for a couple of years now. I am grateful for the push to Just Jot.
But always, in the past, I found myself floundering in February. Hence, the fish:
He is a quick sketch, and the eraser was smudgy. He’s a little cross-eyed. That’s how I feel in this short month that lasts a couple years. Let’s think about this guy. He is the bottom feeder. He lays on or under the sand, both eyes looking up to catch whatever morsel floats down to him. I’m sure he is grateful for the tension that occurs above. That is how I feel about the tidbits of passion the muses drop to me.
It’s too cold for walks. But I am being steady on the stationary bike. Knitting is to keep the hands busy during TV or chats. When I am nearing the end of the day, Duo calls me, and then I do my blog. Whatever comes to mind. I’m trying to go earlier on these, so there is enough time and energy to build callouses on the uke and stretch the fingers for the soprano and alto recorders. Learning how the music theory I learned and applied to the piano and voice can apply to these other ventures.
To help me get back into playing scales, which will help with getting back into piano playing, I picked up one of these roll-up pianos to play with in my bedroom. It has an earphone plug-in, so no one has to put up with the noise but me. So these are my musical flounderings. Right now, it is just mechanical. But I am hoping that my tidbits of time and energy will spark a real musical enjoyment.
My diamond painting area is now open as the dragon is being shipped to his friend. I don’t know which one will be next. But I intend to flounder and fuss about in there and seek the enjoyment.
So that is what my Flounder Feb is all about. Finding enjoyment, if not passions, and hoping that all the flotsam and jetsam of tidbits build a healthier me. We’re not looking for perfection. That’s what happens up topside.
What is your Flounder doing this February? If you choose to play, use my pic and link back here.
Working on my series: Haven.
Doodler (zendoodle.com)
Music major: voice and piano
Mom of four great adults
Reiki II practitioner
I have been on disability/retired for 10 years now from depression, anxiety and fibromyalgia.
Books, games, music, and life — filtered through the mind of a writer, drummer, and philosopher who thinks too deeply about all of it. If it moves something in your chest, I'm interested.
Darswords 
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